The news is not good....
Feb. 12th, 2013 04:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
osodecanelaI worked thru lunch today, trying like Sisyphus to roll the boulder of paperwork up the hill, only to have it roll back down.
Within 10 minutes I got two lousy pieces of news; the first news of the death of a friend last summer, the second cytology results on a patient I'm rather fond of.
There is a man on my LJ friends list, who was introduced to me by a mutual friend from AOL at least 18 years ago. He sent me the sad news that the woman who had introduced us, a woman 4 years my junior, died suddenly last July of a pulmonary embolus, a blood clot that had gone to her lungs. Knowing her, I'm not shocked, but I am profoundly saddened. There was unfinished business between us, things I think needed to be spoken of and worked thru, that we never did. We had met once upon a time on AOL and had spent many hours talking and sharing. It was an emotionally intimate relationship of two people on opposite sides of the country. We met once in person, toured the Holocaust Museum in DC together. Spent 48 hours together, before I had to head on to NY to see my father, who was then in his dying process. Some time later, we had an argument on line. I said something offhand in a chat room and she exploded at me privately. It was not long thereafter I signed off AOL for good, and with that our contact drew to a close. I never returned to try and work out the damage that came between us. I thought perhaps it was better to let sleeping dogs lie. I've regretted that over the years and thought perhaps that at some point contact would happen again. I regret it most heartily now.
I have a pasta pot that hangs in my kitchen. I got an identical one for her, which I carried with me cross country when I visited. I often think of her whenever I use it, and have often wondered how she was and what had become of her. Now sadly, I know.
I need to draw this entry to a close, as in a few minutes I have bad news to deliver. Biopsy results. I have at least gotten this patient, a man of whom I'm quite fond, an appointment to see an oncologist I trust the day after tomorrow.
Within 10 minutes I got two lousy pieces of news; the first news of the death of a friend last summer, the second cytology results on a patient I'm rather fond of.
There is a man on my LJ friends list, who was introduced to me by a mutual friend from AOL at least 18 years ago. He sent me the sad news that the woman who had introduced us, a woman 4 years my junior, died suddenly last July of a pulmonary embolus, a blood clot that had gone to her lungs. Knowing her, I'm not shocked, but I am profoundly saddened. There was unfinished business between us, things I think needed to be spoken of and worked thru, that we never did. We had met once upon a time on AOL and had spent many hours talking and sharing. It was an emotionally intimate relationship of two people on opposite sides of the country. We met once in person, toured the Holocaust Museum in DC together. Spent 48 hours together, before I had to head on to NY to see my father, who was then in his dying process. Some time later, we had an argument on line. I said something offhand in a chat room and she exploded at me privately. It was not long thereafter I signed off AOL for good, and with that our contact drew to a close. I never returned to try and work out the damage that came between us. I thought perhaps it was better to let sleeping dogs lie. I've regretted that over the years and thought perhaps that at some point contact would happen again. I regret it most heartily now.
I have a pasta pot that hangs in my kitchen. I got an identical one for her, which I carried with me cross country when I visited. I often think of her whenever I use it, and have often wondered how she was and what had become of her. Now sadly, I know.
I need to draw this entry to a close, as in a few minutes I have bad news to deliver. Biopsy results. I have at least gotten this patient, a man of whom I'm quite fond, an appointment to see an oncologist I trust the day after tomorrow.
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no subject
Date: 2013-02-13 04:57 am (UTC)*HUGS*
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Date: 2013-02-13 01:19 pm (UTC)Remember contact works both ways ... she could have contacted you as well
When you use your pasta pot, think of her and of the good times you had together, and let the argument and missed opportunities go
no subject
Date: 2013-02-13 02:05 pm (UTC)I'm sorry you got a double-dose of bad news and worse that you had to carry part of it and give it to someone else.
I've felt that you and I have had a little bit of "grudginess" between us as well and I've been hoping to patch that up.
no subject
Date: 2013-02-15 01:47 am (UTC)